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My writing on this prompt has had to go up late this week. We’ve had such a crazy week that has included things like calling 911, buying a new refrigerator, and many other adventures that I would have rather avoided. But, life’s just like that sometimes.
Due to this crazy week, I was prepared to say that I thought my best recent moment was just that in all of the craziness, homeschooling allowed us the flexibility that we needed. However, then another thing happened that made me have to go with it instead.
You see, our oldest son has Asperger’s Syndrome (a high functioning form of Autism). He also, in all likelihood, has ADHD. With this two things coupled together, you can probably imagine that unless a topic is his obsession du jour, he can often not be able to spout back any facts to me about things we are studying or have studied in the past.
While we are not homeschooling primarily for religious reasons, I still often get frustrated when he can’t answer some of the questions we talk about during our religious studies. I worry that I’m not training him up in the way that I, perhaps, should be.
Last night, however, as a family we went to a reconciliation service and I was reminded that I need to not worry quite so much. (For those unfamiliar with that, it is a service for Catholics that is not a full Mass, but rather a time for some songs, prayers, readings, a homily, reflection, and then individuals get in line to go to reconciliation – aka confession.)
After Noah (our eldest) had gone to confession, he came to pray his penance. Afterward, he looked at me and said, “Can I tell you what I prayed to God about?”
“Sure,” I answered.
And, then I can’t exactly give you word per word what he said, because I was surprised and it was long. (It seemed inappropriate to ask if I could write it down, though I really wanted to.) What he told me was that he prayed that God would lead him away from sin and put him on a path toward Him. He said he asked to be on a path toward kindness, charity, and wisdom. He added that he asked God to give him wisdom to know how to live in the right way and how to help others.
I had to throw my arms around him and kiss on him. (Twelve year old boys love that, right?)
It was a reminder that even if he doesn’t have some of that Biblical and Church book knowledge that I want him to have, and even if he still needs us to help him pray whatever prayers he received as penance (otherwise, he’ll forget the prayers as he goes along when he does them himself), he gets the bigger picture. Somewhere in the things we are teaching and the way we are living, he is learning it in his own way. Most importantly, it’s a way that is truly in his heart.
So, what has been one of your best homeschooling moments recently?
Angie is a homeschooling mom to three children and writes about the adventures of her life as a domestically challenged nerd-type turned stay at home Mom at Many Little Blessings. She is also the founder of The Homeschool Classroom, Catholic Mothers Online, Tiny Owl Designs, and Just a Tiny Owl {Etsy shop}.
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I love this, Angie! What a blessing it is when we have those glimpses that show us our kids really do get it.
What a great reminder that the seeds we sow don’t go unharvested! This week, the weather warmed up in MI and we headed outside for our academics. I was impressed as to how much more focused my boys were! Sure we listened to and watched birds, but somehow it seemed that our assignments got done sooner with less prompting.
Praising God for the work He’s doing in your son. Proof that we can plant seeds, water, and provide shelter, but it’s God who does the growing. I love it when their little hearts apprehend the voice of the Lord and choose to obey!
Angie, I linked up, but just have to tell you how much your post touched me this week. Our daughter turns 12 this weekend and also has Asperger’s. We have some of the same concerns about her “book knowledge,” but she just AMAZES me when she prays. I love her so much and her pure faith just touches my heart. I figure we’re called to have “faith like a child,” and that doesn’t mean knowledge is bad – but maybe it’s OK to have an understanding that isn’t as based on it as mine tends to be!
> I figure we’re called to have “faith like a child,” and that doesn’t mean knowledge is bad – but maybe it’s OK to have an understanding that isn’t as based on it as mine tends to be!
I couldn’t agree more. I think of my grandmother often: very little “book” learning, a wicked hard life mostly spent in poverty, and yet she read her Bible faithfully and was a saint. You don’t have to be able to argue well-crafted apologetics, quote lengthy Bible verses, or have lofty theological discussions (as important as all those things are!) to be assured of heaven. In fact, I think kids like ours – so often so unaware, so clueless – are less culpable than NT kids. Aspies tend to bumble into things, or are pushed into actions by their vitally-different brains, as opposed to kids who know better and are capable of more self-control, yet choose to sin. God always seasons the challenges with blessings…
Oh. Oh. Oh. How I wish you were my neighbor! Do you blog much about life with your Aspie?
I have a 10yo ds Aspie, and he’s just as you described: A fountain of facts and figures for things he cares about, yet no amount of pushing can get in any info he doesn’t care about.
And yet, awhile back he totally made our priest’s day when he went to confession: Fr. T asked J what was the best part of his day so far, and J enthusiastically said, “Coming to confession! I love my sins being forgiven!”
It’s a wild ride, isn’t it? 🙂
That’s so sweet of you to say, Denise (about wishing we were neighbors)! 🙂
I actually don’t blog too much about life with an Aspie, although I was just writing down some ideas yesterday about things I should write about and included some of that. (If you have any suggestions of something you would want to read, be sure to let me know!) You will likely appreciate the post I did when my son realized that after First Communion, he would be allowed to keep taking Communion. http://www.manylittleblessings.com/2008/04/you-mean-i-get-to-take-communion-every/
I almost cried when I read what your son said to the priest! That is SO sweet. I love the hearts of these kiddos.
When time when we had a reconciliation service (so my son was just doing confession in a back corner), I suddenly heard him loudly say, “Of course I do! Why wouldn’t I?” My husband and I were both like, “Oh my gosh. What just happened?”
So, afterward, we told him he didn’t have to tell us what was said, but that we were just curious what the priest had asked him to make him say that. He said, “He asked me if I love God.” (I mentioned it to the priest later and he burst out laughing when I said I had asked Noah about it. He said he loved Noah’s reaction to the question.)
I know I would DEFINITELY love to read more about homeschooling or unschooling with Aspies. I feel like there are some things that I agree with in philosophy that are turning out to be hard to put into practice with my daughter… like, I’d LOVE for her learning to be self-directed, but she will sit on the sofa and pet the cat or play iPad solitaire for 8 hours straight unless you say, “Hey, Sarah, would you like to (fill in the blank)!” She will definitely express her preferences, but man, she is NOT the person who will suddenly say, “Oh! I want to go do this other thing now!”
Anyway, all that said, I wish you ladies were MY neighbors too. I could use some more local friends to sit around and share with! 🙂