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Just when you know what you are doing in your homeschool, something changes. We hummed along for two and a half years in our homeschool. I had figured out my children’s learning styles, what really made them tick, and which activities were sure to engage and excite them.
I had no idea, however, just how much I DID NOT know until my oldest hit sixth grade.
I am not speaking of the classic adolescent parent/child struggle. I am referring to the tremendous change that took place in my child as a LEARNER, and ultimately as a precious soul whose education falls on my shoulders. My background as a degreed educator and all of the reading I had done about middle grades education could not prepare me for the changes that would take place.
Are we ever prepared for the changes our children go through? After seeking advice from veteran homeschool moms, reading everything I could get my hands on, listening to my child, and a lot of PRAYER, I am able to articulate some ways I feel we, as the homeschool parent, must change with our middle grades child.
Give your child the independence they crave.
Children this age NEED to be independent. I had been so used to guiding my child through everything that it was hard for me to accept this independence, even if it meant her failing sometimes. I’m also striving to find activities which are just HERS, an anchor if you will.
Make them accountable.
My daughter has a daily and weekly checklist. She can complete her work in the order she pleases, but it must be done by Friday. I also try and give her some larger assignments (projects and papers) to complete by a certain deadline.
Embrace Interest Led Learning.
We have always done a lot of unit studies, but they were normally driven by my interests. Now, I try to let my daughter decide more of what she would like to learn. For example, she takes a special interest in the biology and anatomy, so we are doing a large unit study about Galen, the ancient Greek physician, and she is loving it.
Keeping reading out loud to them.
Kids can ALWAYS learn from a quality read aloud. Read alouds are a way we have always connected. Who doesn’t love a fabulous story curled up with their favorite fleece blanket and a cup of tea? (You know, I’m a HUGE read aloud fan!)
Be willing to change your educational philosophy, sometimes drastically.
I just heard Susan Wise Bauer say this, and it’s so true. What works at the age of 8 may be the WRONG thing at the age of 11. A departure from something does not mean it (or YOU) was wrong. It just means a change was in order.
You can get through it, but it won’t look like just what it looks like now. Parenting is like holding a butterfly – amazing and beautiful, but if you hold it too tightly you’ll have a real mess on your hands.
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Blessings to all my fellow parents of middle grade students, as you handle your precious butterflies!
Mary is a homeschooling mom of an 11 year old, Anna and 8 year old, Grant. She prides herself on her ability to CHANGE! She is a musician, reader, and lover of all things education! Visit her at Homegrown Learners.
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As we finished the third volume of Story of the World, I found myself thinking about what I wanted to do for history when we were done with SoTW. I have been reading so much about how it’s no longer useful for students to fill their minds with memorized facts when they can easily access it on their phone and it’s more a way of thinking creatively that will benefit our children. We have been leaning more and more toward more interest-led learning to promote this kind of thinking.
Theresa – I agree with you. SOTW is a spine for us now. I use it because it’s such a great resource for Grant, and a jumping off place for Anna. I admire your Interest Led homeschool!
Mary, this was a lot of great wisdom! I especially love that you mentioned, “Keep reading aloud.” We do this DAILY as a family – not because we have to, but because we want to, and it is amazing how we learn and grow together, and how connected it keeps us! Thank you!
Thanks, Joan. I hope they always want to be read aloud to — we just finished The Hobbit and we’re starting The Fellowship of the Ring this week… good books know no age restriction when read alouds are concerned!
This is a timely post for me. My oldest turns 12 tomorrow. I’m still working on loosening the reins a little and giving him more independence. It saddens me a bit to see him growing up, but grow up he must. Thanks for the encouragement!
These are bittersweet years, aren’t they?
Mary, my girls are middle graders (6th and 7th), and we’ve made some changes this year, too. One of these was to add composition as a subject. I’m pleased that their formal writing skills are improving. Also, my dc do more independent reading, although we do still read aloud some of our books. We all enjoy that!
We are adding in some presentations on the computer (Keynote on the Mac) and my daughter is loving that – composing her own presentations makes her feel so accomplished.
What a great (and timely) post! My daughter is in 5th grade this year and I have also noticed her increasing desire for independent work. Thanks for sharing your experiences as you navigate the waters of the middle grades!
You are welcome — I started seeing lots of changes in fifth grade. 😉
Love this Mary. I so agree with it. As you know Keilee is ‘loosely reined’ and seems to thrive. I still read aloud to her almost every single day. Great post. 🙂
You know I so admire what you do with Keilee. I always think about you two as I’m doing things with Anna — striving to foster more Interest Led learning and motivation.
Wow. This is timely for me, since I’m just heading into this territory. I’ve already seen some emotional changes in my son. I wasn’t prepared for this kind of change too. Nice to have the heads up! I like the idea of a checklist. We already do that a little on a daily basis one day a week.
I don’t think we’re ever prepared for the changes that occur. I’m seeing emotional changes, too – but everyone talks about that part. It was the learning changes that really floored me! Blessings to you!